How to Feel Your Feelings

At the end of December, I celebrated my 3rd anniversary of living alcohol-free.

Part of what drinking was to me was a break from the intensity of my feelings – the physical sensations of emotions inside my body. Because I made alcohol my emotional refuge, breaking up with it felt… terrifying.😵‍💫

It seemed counterintuitive that after so many years of practicing mindfulness meditation, doing yoga, and going to therapy, I would still consistently look to booze for sanctuary. It was a frustrating push-me-pull-you that I struggled with for years.

– Until I realized that I had been thinking my feelings instead of feeling them. I had learned some really effective spiritual techniques for bypassing and gaslighting my feelings. Fortunately, I've since unlearned those strategies as my default process and now prioritize processing and understanding sensations through my body.

Learning how to actually feel and move emotions through my body has changed everything.

My body no longer feels like an echo-y chamber of shadows I'm trying to convince myself I'm not afraid of, escaping into my addiction when I'm too tired to keep outrunning the encroaching darkness. 

My internal landscape now feels like a petting zoo. 🐐🐰Emotions show up and I say “Aw, hey buddy! C'mere, let me hold you!”

Here is my favorite strategy for feeling and processing emotions in the body…

A RECIPE FOR FEELING YOUR FEELINGS

1. Notice when a strong emotional sensation arises

2. Release the thought around/ attached to the feeling – like you could just snip off the thought

3. Sense the feeling in your body and draw gentle, loving, allowing breath toward it, into it

4. Pay attention to the felt sense in the body and ride the waves until the feeling completes or unwinds (*when feelings are not fueled by thoughts, they usually take a few seconds to a minute to resolve)

5. Optional: Place one or both hands on the place where you notice the most sensation as you breathe

And that's it!

Becoming aware of what you're grieving and this recipe for feeling your feelings are the two suggested pre-requisites for my embodiment series Turning Toward Grief.

By moving grief through the body, you'll learn how to tap into the wisdom of the grieving process and access your own embodied intuition.

I hope you’ll join us for this transformational work…if you feel.